Wednesday 28 January 2015

The haves and have nots... (21 - 27 January 2015)



With Carole now back at home and work, I was in danger of becoming a Norma no mates and clearly in the have not (friends) camp, but luckily, Trevor and Jill from Bideford who were here last year turned up so I at least know someone!
But on a more serious note during my meandering over the past few days the differences here between the haves and have nots is a bit clearer. My walks along the coastal plain just behind the beach take me through little settlements with the usual chickens but most people and houses seemed ok. It's only when you walk up away from the beach and in the hills when that changes slightly. Here it's a mix of quite big relatively flash houses, lovely old original wooden Thai houses. Small two roomed houses on stilts, small rows of tiny, concrete houses and some dwellings that can only be described as "shacks" - corrugated iron and old planks of wood held together with nails and bits of string. As you glance in trying not to be obviously nosy, they are dark, dusty and look supremely uncomfortable. There's also a bit of building work going on here as I assume some people are selling off parcels of land and the odd new house is being built. But the labour force looks very much like the have nots from Myanmar - the tiny women, with their faces covered in the sandalwood paste they all used out there seem to be the best plasterers. They clearly have so little if they have to be exiled from their own country and family to work as labourers here. At the end of each day there are truck loads of these labourers being taken, I assume, to wherever the bosses provide accommodation for them. I shudder to think what it must be like. And I also assume they get less than the Thai minimum wage which is only around $10 a day anyway.
But what all these areas do share is a have - each little village has so many "shops" and "restaurants", It seems every other house is selling something or another with their goods either on smart shelves in their living room or on dusty shelves with a few dusty vegetables out the front. And the smells of cooking are everywhere from the little eating places, although the smells of star anise, green curry spices and bbq's seem a bit out of place in the mornings.... I think very few people here cook at home, the sheer amount of small eating places means they can't.



The other thing all places seem to have is their own well for water, it looks like most houses have their own. This is the case not just in the hilly areas but also down on the coast. But what is new is every so often a house has installed a water purifying vending machine where for about 2p a litre or less you can fill up your big water bottles with reverse osmosis purified water. Looks a great plan, I guess it can save lots of money rather than having the big bottles of water delivered and there are loads of the machines about. They just seem to plumb them into their own well and off they go, making a bit of money.



Another interesting team of have nots appear early morning and evening. I don't profess to fully understand the Thai rubbish collecting service, but along the main road there are areas with wheelie bins where people come and drop their black bags of rubbish. The rubbish pickers appear on their motorbikes and sidecars and work their way through the full black bags removing anything that is recyclable. Often with a small child in tow and nothing protecting their hands.. A tough life. But up in the hills the rubbish is a lot more charming with these cute little "Miss Clean" bins outside a lot of places. They look like an illustration from a child's fairy story.



People all seem to have loads of coconut trees and banana plants. I think it's also jackfruit season if there is such a thing, lots of these huge fruits are still on the trees wrapped protectively in old jumpers or plastic backs for protection.



I try and vary my walks either up in the hills, behind the beach or into Fisherman's Village, Bophut. On this stretch of road I walk past an area I call Beauty Queen corner - The World Hotel and The Peace Resort are next door to one another. Think about it.....
And you're never far from a temple in Thailand, this local one in Mae Nam is guarded by these rather impressive serpents. They're all quite large temples but it's nice that they are real working ones rather than the big set pieces with loads of tourists.



But generally as I wander, people always say a cheery "hello". I always reply but wonder sometimes if I am saying "Bad Minging" or something similar in reply, the ghost of the British policeman from "Allo, Allo" still lingers.... Often I will get offered a lift on the back of a motorbike too, one which I have declined so far! Not sure the Thai's understand just walking when you could go by bike.
But the big have not of the last few weeks is a positive, it's been a while since I've seen a live snake, just dead ones....


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Location:แม่น้ำ,Thailand

Thursday 22 January 2015

Hydroponic Hills (11 - 21 January 2015)




Whilst Carole has been here it's been easier to explore areas where I wouldn't always want to walk to on my own, especially away from the beach and up into the wooded hills behind. So we have been exploring a little and wandered around the little roads, through small villages, temples, past isolated houses and negotiated rather too many barking dogs for my liking. Up the gentle gradient past, fields full of coconut palms and cooler in the shade of the high trees. It's really peaceful up there away from the ring road traffic noise so we were surprised one day when venturing way off the beaten track to spot a large red miniature windmill on what appeared to be the roof of a local house......


We investigate further and enter the slightly surreal world of "Samui Sheep Farm and Salad" a rather bizarre combination of a hydroponic lettuce farm and children's playground featuring the cleanest sheep Carole or I have ever seen...






It looks like it should be in Kent. It has an extremely well organised series of open sided sheds growing lovely looking salad leaves which he apparently sells to the local restaurants. But the children's area was amazing. He has a five year old son and I think this may have been his inspiration. As well as huge models of Shaun the sheep, there are eight real live ones he shipped in from a farm near Bangkok.





There are also other creative things around, the sink for the loos is based on the muddy puddle from Peppa the Pig, there is a magic one legged chair. In the middle there is a sheep pen ready and waiting for what looks like the next episode of "one man and his dog" but having seen the state of the local dogs I'm not sure any of them would have been up to the task! The guy who owns it was interesting, perfect English, but no idea of his back story. He showed us all around. It's due to officially open in a couple of weeks but we can't quite work out who it's aimed at.

On our walks we also came across a coffee shop looking for staff. I was going to get Carole to apply, well she may as well earn a bit of pocket money on rainy days but we then realised exactly how much it paid. At 40 baht an hour (80p), like Naomi Campbell she really felt it was it quite worth getting out of bed for even if it was raining....



The time Carole's been here has, as usual gone too quickly. Though she did arrive in Royal style. The night before she came here the son of the owner suggested she should have a bouquet of flowers to greet her at the airport. Well I guess that's what happens at the Florist Hotel... I wasn't sure quite how much of a plonker she might feel but they were so sweet in suggesting it I agreed. Unfortunately we were, due to traffic, a little late going to pick her up so I didn't have the time to find the obligatory small child in a frilly frock to make the actual presentation. All the other tired arrivals just couldn't work out when she was going to cut a ribbon or launch a plane and were hurriedly checking out last week's Thailand Hello! Mag to find out who this Duchess of Geneva actually was....


But as well as hydroponic in the hills, the weather's been a bit too hydroponic with the rain still too frequent for our liking. People are making, unnecessarily I feel, jokes about it being English weather..... We were going to reply that no, it was more like Welsh weather but thought the subtlety might be lost on the other European nationals. The roads got flooded in Chewang one day when 21mm fell in a short time, but there has also been the almost all day long stuff... But it hasn't stopped us doing the usual lolling around by the pool and having the odd glass or two of why why. So much so that even Carole is greeted by "why why?" as soon as she walks in anywhere... We make the annual pilgrimage to Tropical Murphy's, check out the new shopping centre in Chewang, shop in Jim Thompson. On our walks, so far snake free, but loads of very large spiders, at times it has felt like Easter with a couple of little chicken families, one with yellow chicks and one with black chicks scrabbling about.



Carole has also pulled - well in the guy's dreams.... The French proprietor of a beach restaurant took a bit of a fancy to her and thought that telling her he was from Monaco might swing the deal - again in his dreams. We reckon he was more from Marseille than Monaco anyway. They are stupid though, all that trying to come on to people does is mean they just don't come back to your restaurant. We have also watched in horror as the local tailor delivered the latest in "Hausfrau Chic" to the German couple in the room next door to Carole. It was hard to contain our shocked gasps as he proudly presented the bright orange, man made fibre, shiny, crushed velvet fitted number with a lot of front drapery that she has ordered. We were very surprised when she seemed pleased... I just hope that when she gets it home she realises and doesn't wear it to the office party. People never learn! Carole also had the pleasure of her first returning guests party here at the Florist Resort. It was a slightly more subtle affair than usual, obviously a few less returning guests in January and sadly without the mad cocktail juggler and his flaming Malibu bottles.... But they provided free food and drink and a man with a guitar. I would also like to say he sang but even in a charitable mood I couldn't call what came out of his mouth singing.... But again, how nice and generous of the hotel to do this. But the hotel is still really empty given it's high season and Carole noticed how much quieter Chaweng was compared to last time she visited. But it really will be empty tomorrow, Carole has to go home already.....


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Saturday 10 January 2015

Thai traffic rules (5 -9 January 2015)




A summary....

Please drive on the left wherever possible. But don't worry too much if you are only going a few hundred metres, it's probably not worth crossing the traffic just for that. If you are on a motorbike you can drive on the wrong side for as far as you like.
Motorbikes may use the provided pavements as motorbike lanes to travel any distance in either direction. These handy motorbike lanes are also for use by pedal cyclists.
If driving on these motorcycle lanes at night it can be helpful to use the horn to warn any pedestrians to get out of the way but it's not obligatory, you can just come up behind them and rev the engine, they will soon jump quickly out of the way. It's good fun to do this as well.
Motorbikes and pedal cyclists are not required to have lights on at night.
It is the responsibility of pedestrians to move out of your way not the other way around even on pavements. It is fine to miss them by a hair's breadth or even just touch them with your vehicle but any more than that may slow down your journey.
There are not many traffic lights on Samui, so don't worry, just treat them as pretty lights. Obvs Europeans do know what they are for, but hey, you are on holiday so it's cool to ignore them.
The new signs asking for 100% adherence to helmet wearing for motorcyclists is advisory at best - or just a pretty pale blue street decoration.
Similarly any advisory speed limits can be seen in the same way, pretty yellow street decorations.
You do not need to move to one side to let a flashing blue light vehicle go past. Just speed up a bit of possible. If after about ten minutes they still can't get past, you may pull over for them, but it's not obligatory.
The faded black and white zebra like patterns on some of the roads can be ignored. We think they mean something but the reason has been lost in the mists of time along with most of the white paint.
You can park your motorbike wherever you like, the middle of the pavement is a good place as it's less likely to get hit by anything else. Pedestrians can walk in the road to get around it.
If you need to reverse to get out of your pavement parking spot you don't need to look around to see if there's anyone there. Most pedestrians have a sixth sense.
Whilst riding along the pavement on your motorcycle if you come across a stray dog trying to get food from the rubbish bags it is fine to give it a healthy kick.
The legal driving age for motorbikes is flexible but boys can start on the roads at about age 10.
Texting and updating Facebook on the go is allowed. You only need one hand to drive a motorbike.
European's on unfamiliar motorbikes on the different side of the road from at home should just go with the flow. It's fine for your small kids to be on there with you with no protection at all. The bone setters at the local hospitals are very experienced.



Ok slight exaggeration for literary effect but not too far from the truth! But the road madness seems to work for the Thai's at least. They seem to walk around here undamaged whereas you see loads of Europeans each day with various bits of their anatomy bandaged or in plaster casts, with walking sticks or crutches.



But whilst the Thai's do seem to forget their manners whilst driving their two or four wheeled chariots at least on "dry land" they are polite. Contrast that to most Europeans. Given the bike parking situation and heavy rain creating huge puddles, it's often necessary to "give way" to another pedestrian to get by on the pavement. "Grumpy old woman alert now." Just when did virtually all Europeans forget their manners? You wait to let someone pass and they completely ignore you, no thank you let alone a simple acknowledgement - even the kids who I would have thought the schools may have taught better. It's really getting to me, unnecessarily I know, but each time it happens I say "you're welcome" as if they had actually uttered the thank you word. Childish I know but it makes me feel better. Rant over!
The dogs here continue to create contrast too. There are some very pampered, very cute dogs. There are also some definitely less than pampered ones. Even some of those with a collar on who are owned by someone can be in a state. There's this old boy I pass every day.


Looks like he's owned by the upholstery/ foam cut to size shop so there are lots of comfy places for him to rest. But he seems to prefer a dip in the pavement filled with sand. He's got such a sad little face. Then there's this little pooch, dressed in the latest Thai doggie fashion, a nice cosy padded jacket, well he might get cold it is only 30C...




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Wednesday 7 January 2015

What year is it anyway? (26 December 2014 - 5 January 2015




As New Year's Eve dawned, I could be forgiven for being a little confused. The hotel had asked me to come and celebrate the start of 2025, a hotel in Bophut had been wishing us all a Happy Xmas 2015 for the last week and in Thailand we were approaching the year 2558.




But being certain we were still in 2014 I started the evening with a glass of pink bubbles (pee why?) and some Kettle Chips by the pool with the two Swedish girls next door before entering the fray that the hotel promised as an evening of fun, food and games..... It's so good of the hotel to put this on free of charge as an "opportunity to improve our relationship and connection". The party promised free food, soft drinks, a staff funny show and the cocktail showman - as Mr Bennett may have said - who has been my friend these many parties..... Additionally we would be invited to participate in games. Hoping to avoid the latter, Irene, Agnita and I chose a table as far away from the small stage as possible... Normally there is a very good live band headed by Angel, the very popular front of house manager, but for some reason not this year. It was a shame, she was really missed by us all, there are a lot of returning guests here and it was a pity she was not part of the party.
And as returning guests, we three had a bottle of wine delivered to the table from Surajit and his family (the owners) which was really nice of them and of course much appreciated. The good food eaten, the festivities began with drinking games on the stage, a raffle for many prizes, and no, I didn't manage to win the rice cooker I had so coveted, and the housekeeping staff doing their "funny show" of Hawaiian dancing. The poor girls had to work really hard appearing four times, the only time I didn't like the performance was when the new General Manager joined them on stage and proceeded to inappropriately, I thought, "bump and grind". But the girls "did good", one or two helped I feel by the odd cocktail...



And speaking of cocktails we were treated to two performances of the juggling cocktail man, he's getting a lot better and I think only dropped a couple of molotov's... They did seem to be brushing up a lot of glass though throughout the evening. But everyone enjoyed the show with lots of loud, good natured cheers at his near misses. My main Health and Safety concern was him taking a large slug of beer every so often during the difficult bits. There was also a great German couple, she looked so like Sharon Osbourne and at one point led a conga around the restaurant, out onto the beach and back in again. She was in bed most of the next day...
But eventually we were called to the beach to welcome in the New Year, whichever one it was! The hotel provided lots of lanterns to light. I was smugly PC in refusing one (I know, not a position I take very often...) they are really dangerous to to sea life here. They have made an effort and use a wooden frame but most still have a fine wire cross frame to hold them together. I'm sure the hotel used non wire ones...
The weather this year was ok with no rain so it was lovely to be on the beach at midnight watching the massive displays of fireworks all around the huge bay here and across on Koh Phangnan.




But the weather didn't quite play ball when it came to the lanterns. The wind was just a bit too high and as each one was released it seemed to blow directly sideways, a live firebomb landing on any human who got in the way... The odd one that got any lift soon got trapped in the palm trees at onetime setting the trunk on fire! But on a positive note it did mean fewer to damage the Dolphins! Tina and John, my Brit blog readers joined us in time for New Year so that was good, but sadly the lack of a live band meant we had to miss out on John's excellent stagecraft...



All in all it was a great evening and good on the Florist Resort for putting it on.
All has been quiet on the Western front since then with Thailand taking a long holiday with a lot of the world and going back today, 5 January. I have spent my time as usual wandering, lolling and reading. I did finally pop into Chaweng yesterday for the famed Sunday lunch at Tropical Murphy's - a must do at least once when I'm here. I also wanted to see what the new Central Festival shopping development looked like. I have always like the chaos that is Chaweng, the road behind the beach. It's a mish mash of stalls, shops, bars and restaurants. Motorbikes are parked all over the pavements so you end up walking in the road, dodging the taxis and songthaews, the sound of the taxis touting for trade drowned out by the bargaining going on in the shops. I was hoping they hadn't taken any of this madness away and was pleased to see that they hadn't. They've done a good job with the entrance. It's big but not too obvious and the mix of new shops and restaurants inside is good, including a new Central department store, a first for Samui. Carole will also be very happy at the huge new Jim Thompson shop there and it's only a few steps away from Tropical Murphy's. Excellent town planning.







On my travels I saw this push chair (look carefully, it is there behind the photographer's headphone cable...) being used to carry veg and lemongrass that had just been picked and it made me realise that you never see a Thai child in a push chair. Not sure if this is to do with the very uneven pavements or the fact that they also seem to be unofficial but handy motorbike lanes. The children are either carried in a blanket if they are really tiny, tucked between the adults on a motorbike or toddling along under their own steam. Contrast that to the two American expats opposite me who had a huge contraption worthy of a Sherpa going up Everest with this tiny baby lost within it once it was hauled on to the father's back. It did make me think that a we sometimes over engineer our lives - I just wish they'd over engineer the bits I want like the wiffy....

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