Brit's Abroad - the sequel (24 - 26 December 2014)

Finally it's that time again, and I am very excited. Not about Xmas you understand, but in 24 hours I can open and eat my mince pies....
The hotel decided to get into the holiday spirt by hosting a Xmas Eve Extravaganza, well a do in the beachside restaurant. We were promised good food, alcoholic beverage, cooking demonstration, the juggling bartender (and old friend these last few years.....) and unspecified games... I have palled up again with Tina and John, party pals and blog readers extraordinaire who I met here last year at Xmas. It's so nice to see them again.

So we all pay our money for the do but I think Mr cock up visited the booking process and it was not as well attended as it might have been. In total we were we were an eclectic mix of three Brits, four German girls, two Swiss couples and one very bemused Russian couple. There was also one random single man whose nationality we never did discover but what we do know about him is he was "feeling no pain" and we were relived the next morning not to discover his body in the pool. And a lot of empty tables... On a positive note that did leave lots of of extra food for us and no queues for it! The bbq went down well. Another positive for the hotel it also left lots of leftover salad for the breakfast buffet... But like the Titanic the band played on, as usual it was Angel who does this very well. There was also a new lady singing who I have not seen before in a rather fetching Xmas outfit...



John got the dancing started with a good tune or two. He was also wearing a rather special Xmas outfit, the tropical version of a Xmas jumper...


Then the juggling bartender appears. Someone, somewhere on this island drinks lots of Malibu as empty Malibu bottles, fabricated into Molotov cocktails by the addition of a diesel soaked rag stuffed in the neck are what he juggles... Health and safety eat your heart out. Tina, John and I knew what was coming so slowly moved back out of the line of fire but the poor Russian couple were taken somewhat by surprise as the lethal, flaming glass bottles were tossed about with gay abandon, and unusually for Russians seemed to be too polite to move away... As soon as he started one of the staff appeared at the edge with her dustpan and brush at the ready - not much confidence there! But I think he's been practising this year as he only dropped one. I know I make a lot of fun out of him but he is quite good in his own way and very entertaining just perhaps not quite in the way he means to be! The cooking demo and games were cancelled though for not enough participants, which was probably not a bad thing so the band played on.....



It was a really good evening though, well we enjoyed it it, just such a pity for the hotel that it was so sparsely attended. We were looked after by a staff ratio of more than that of the best cruise ships. Today they are already sorting the bookings for the free New Year's bash on the beach so that should be a bit livelier. The fact that it's also free may make the difference too!
Having had all the celebrations in the European mode on Xmas Eve, it left little festive cheer for we three Brits come Xmas Day. But in the absence of a turkey dinner or even a turkey stir fry we meet up early afternoon in the hotel restaurant. Picture the azure blue sea, white dotty clouds, gentle beach breeze and slowly swishing waves on the pale yellow sand.... Now picture the reality! Huge waves leaving very little sand, the wind and storms of the last few days have washed up enormous amounts of seaweed and detritus which cover the little sand there is and the wind whizzes in with a real wind chill factor under steel grey skies. But undaunted we Brit's are at the seaside for Xmas Day so we struggle through hamburgers, chips and chicken sandwiches. Followed by a mince pie from my P&G hamper (note to hamper suppliers, change them next year they weren't very nice) and a Ferrero Rocher bought from the 7/11 all washed down with diet coke. We know how to live it up! It really did feel like we were at Southend or Scarborough. I was so cold I had a sweater on and there was that smell of seaweed that you get at home. But it was fun I enjoyed it. Looking at Facebook though, we had swapped beaches with Wales where they really did have gently lapping waves, blue skies and little scudding clouds. World weather eh! The local dogs think it's cold too, they're all wearing their vests!


As it's an ordinary day here in Thailand everything goes on the same and it was Walking Street in Mae Nam. I took a Xmas evening stroll around but it was generally same, same but with Santa hats.


The other reason for wandering around was to find some wiffy to Skype or Viber home. It had been hopeless most of the day so I thought I'd try elsewhere, but no luck. Then the monumental thunderstorms starting at 10 pm and going on through the night (the rain was so loud and heavy you could hardly hear the great claps of thunder through it) put paid to any wiffy hope for a while. It was off completely first thing this morning (Boxing Day) but has now come back on for a while. But when the power goes off which it has, the wiffy goes off before the generator kicks in. I managed to get a walk this morning before the rain restarted but now sit by the pool under cover with a towel round my shoulders to keep warm watching the rain fall into the pool. It's such a shame for people only here for a short time, this weather really is unseasonal, by now it really should be gentle waves and little scudding white clouds. The storms do seem to have blown away some of the wild wind however, today the sea is much calmer and at there was even some activity at the boat pier where there has been none for the last few days. I do hope so, the season is quite short here in Samui and every day with no boat trips or beach bars open is another day less business for the locals who depend on the tourist baht.
But wiffy permitting later I will be doing what most Brit's do today, lolling about in front of the telly, all I'll be missing is the leftover turkey! Enjoy...


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Samui Flipflop Camp (20- 23 December 2014)

I know it's more normal to call it boot camp, but in the absence of boots I am doing all my walking in some lovely, spotty, brought direct from Brazil by David and Ant Haviana's. And have the scars to prove it....



I discover my UP24 can log individual workouts, well workouts is perhaps pushing it a bit far, perhaps we can call them walkouts instead? Being able to measure things like effort always spurs me on to greater effort so I have made some rather grand strides (in more ways than one...) recently. I am most proud of my 15.5 mile walk yesterday. But frankly, had I done a bit more measuring of the cakes in and the steps out during the summer perhaps I would have needed to make a little less effort and measuring now!



The cloudier and cooler weather is really helping though, it means I don't have to get up too early to walk before the sun comes out - it's not bothering too much at the moment - or wait till the evening when it gets cooler. It's really wild and windy at the beachside but just back from the beach the cloud cover and breeze make it good, pleasantly cool walking weather. That's a first, me describing weather as pleasantly cool, I never thought I would use those same words in the same sentence...
I was in the middle of a walk yesterday when I received the text telling me David was back on Radio Wales Celebrity quiz. I was stranded in Carrefour, and in a first for Thailand I had great difficulty finding any free wifi. Yes, Carrefour provide it but it was broken. I ended up paying an outrageous amount in Starbucks, outrageous in as much as every little bar and restaurant here provides it free. But worth every baht as David triumphs again. Let's hope he makes it to Friday's final. It was funny, last time I was in Carrefour was in November in Calais stocking up on wine - plus ca change, that's what I was doing there yesterday. It was all a bit different though - little choice and high prices. But festive fare purchased, a heavy box, and in the spirit of all boot camps I carried it back in my backpack, the extra weight meaning more effort. But Xmas shopping is now over as I brought the mince pies with me!
The walks continue to be entertaining, there's always something to look at.
There's the tailor with a big shop and beautiful display making obeisance to the beribboned tree outside. Not sure if it's working too well though as the display has been the same for two years to my knowledge so not sure much has shifted. Then there's my search for odd signs. These two caught my eye. The first, rather puerile I know, did amuse me but I did wonder how the two bottles to stop it waving about were filled...



And the second, not too clear from my photography I know, advertising the astonishing fact that their laundry is done in "clean water". Does make me wonder what the local Chinese laundry I use locally uses...


There are always lots of animals to admire - or otherwise! The dog on a lead being taken for a swift run by two people on a motorbike. Then there's the line up of dogs in the temple getting their daily feed from the monk. It's hard to see in this picture but there's a sweet family of Mum and tiny puppies right at the end. I won't get too close for a picture though as the dogs are a bit feral...



There's quite a bit of local building work going on and I am always surprised that in this, a fairly conservative culture, the majority of plasterers are female. I'm not sure if they are local Thai's as I know a lot of labour comes in here from Cambodia and Myanmar.
Most days I get as far as the Lomprayah Pier on my walk but with the high seas there doesn't seem too much activity there. I'm not convinced anyone leaving from here recently would have had such a "Bon" voyage.



The local papers here talk a lot about how the military have done sterling work clearing some of the beach areas, especially Pattaya, of the dense covering of deckchairs and seedy bars. I think they perhaps should now pay attention to the pavements. Any walk here is an obstacle course of not only the usual broken pavements and broken sewers but sleeping dogs (let them lie is what I say...), parked and moving motorbikes, and stalls doing a roaring trade in BBQ chicken.



In my travels I also walk past many beauty shops but the fish spa asking clients to remove their shoes seemed a slightly obvious instruction to me, not sure how the fish could nibble away otherwise... I also see the white dog with one ear up and one ear down. Today I apologise, I did call him a "handsome boy" before, but I now need to change that to "pretty girl", today I noticed evidence that she is probably feeding pups... And I always see a surprising large number of chickens, given this pic was taken on the main ring road round the island...


Anyway that's all for now, only two sleeps to Xmas so I need to get back to Flipflop camp before I eat all my mince pies!


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Catching Up (15 - 20 December 2014)

It's still all quiet here, there are a few more people generally but not many, even Walking Street on Thursday was half empty. But there's good news on Darling, the lovely black dog (above) from last year. Apparently he was still a bit naughty after he had been "done" and was still chasing motorbikes. One of the local traders further down the road wanted him to be "removed", as in permanently, but luckily before that happened a new home was found for him. The people who have taken him on are friends of the girl who had been looking after him here. They apparently have a bit of land where he can run about. They often bring him back to the beach here so I will keep a look out for him. But apparently he's got fatter in his contentment so hope I still recognise him! I do miss seeing him though.




There's been a few more wild days, the seas on Wednesday really were high. The evenings are chilly (well Gill's version of chilly which is quite warm really....) but one evening I needed light wrap and leggings! And today people eating at a beach restaurant were wearing sweaters against the wind chill. But it's still more than warm enough to sit and enjoy this whole pool that I have had all to myself for a week but as we get nearer to Xmas it is slowly filling up. I guess I have been really spoiled having the whole place to myself and am not sure I like these interlopers. The man on the roof by the way is trying to fix the iffy wiffy.






I have also been catching up with the snake population. I saw my first and hopefully my last in snake alley. Carole and I christened the part of the road where we had more frequent sightings this last year. We were always more watchful walking there. It's part of the nice back road route on our morning walk. This one I was glad was at least dead, but I guess the snake may not have felt the same!



I've also been catching up with old faces. The hotel put on one of their "welcome back and thankyou returning guest parties" on Thursday night, coinciding with the return of their two grown up children who are studying in Australia. There was a big family table as well as guests and Surajit's family is quite a large one now. Angel, the front of house manager, her husband and another of the front of house staff did sterling work as the band - they are very good and do it professionally as well as their day job. I met up with a Swiss couple I have met here the last two years, it's always nice to see a friendly familiar face. It's so good of the hotel to do this, free food and drink, plus the music - but perhaps this is why they have so many returning guests.
I've also been getting my daily steps back up, for some reason it's easier to get up here and go for a walk than it is at home. It's so much easier just to get up and don a pair of shorts (don't try and visualise that, not a pretty sight, but even that is better than some of the get ups you see Europeans in here...), a top and a pair of flip flops. The UP 24 doesn't quite know what's hit it. However I do have a summer of too many Mary Berry Great British Bake Off challenges - both cooking and eating - to walk off... And an evening walk does always make that first glass of why why taste much better... The words are still "why why" by the way - I did try the other day asking for "white wine" but got no further than the usual puzzled look. As soon as I changed to "why why" the look of comprehension dawned accompanied by the relieved "ah, why why", not as relieved as me of course as the cold wine was served!
The Thai economy obviously is doing better than the Russian one, on one of my walks along the back roads some of the places that were just open plots of land now sport lovely little houses. But the gardening business perhaps isn't doing so well. One place that had a beautiful flower nursery has had the greenhouses bit knocked down and a new house built. But what is growing well there is the cute little white puppy who had one ear up and one down, now grown into a handsome boy as you can see.



Wifi issues continue to plague me - I really should be chilled about it. I do find it really annoying though as the Sky reps found to their cost this summer at home! At Jordan's tonight, usually my one port in a wiffy storm had network communication issues, i.e. no wiffy. The Florist have had people working this afternoon so fingers crossed it's good now at the hotel. I guess wiffy can't be good in all places all of the time, but I'd be happy with some of the places some of the time... But wiffy allowing I have been catching up with my reality tv. Given I'm 7 hours ahead, most of the excitement takes place too late for me to watch in real time so I have to be very careful that social media doesn't spoil the surprise. I got it very wrong with the X Factor. Just before watching the final, I went on to the iTunes Store for something and the first thing that greeted me was a banner ad for "the winner's single" and Ben's picture - bit of a giveaway but I guess it took away the tension whilst watching! I'm being a bit more careful with the Apprentice, but the best time to avoid knowing what's happening is to watch early morning here, and even I don't want to go to Jordan's bar for that. Hopefully the Florist fix on the wiffy here will help so I can watch at my leisure with a coffee in the morning. Just for clarity for any new readers to this blog, wiffy is the tech why why equivalent here. Ask for Wifi in a normal English accent and you often get a puzzled stare. Then ask for Wiffy and a password is proffered post haste after the relieved "ah, wiffy" along with a huge smile is heard. Easy.
I've also been trying to catch up with life under military rule which is still in effect here. The only real visible difference I can see is that the big sign with inflated taxi prices has been replaced with one insisting on 100% adherence to helmet wearing by motorcyclists. Not sure the sign is that clear as as far as I can see, almost 100% don't wear them. The Europeans are as bad. I saw one family yesterday, the man, the woman and two small children on a motorbike, the only one with a helmet was the man - just shows where his priorities lie. I still haven't found out the taxi answer. The military are supposed to be clamping down heavily on the taxi Mafia here. I do hope so as it did make the taxis here almost on a par with a black cab in London.
I've also done a quick recce of the big Tesco Lotus, I needed to pop into the Boots there for Soltan. Quite proud of my Thai language recognition, I can now tell when it's on 3 for 2 or just special offer. For those who are interested, no big purchases this time, it was just on special offer... But they still don't recognise a UK Advantage card only the Thai one. Same in Tesco's, free wiffy if you enter your Clubcard number but it wouldn't take a UK one. What's gone wrong with the global economy is what I want to know...
And the good news is that the hotel wiffy is back up to speed - hope I am not speaking too soon. I guess the only downside to that is I don't have the excuse to visit a local bar just to catch up and communicate....





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Location:แม่น้ำ,Thailand

Home Alone (11 - 15 December)

24 hours door to door, three flights including an unusually empty Bangkok Airway's flight and I finally arrive but it looks like I'm home alone... Great welcome from the hotel and a lovely coconut to drink made all the nicer by a sneaky measure of local rum. But everywhere is so quiet. In my area of 12 rooms around the pool I am the only room occupied since I arrived five days ago and the rest of the place is almost empty too. I know the Russians are staying away due to their economic problems (shame...) but it still feels unusual. So I am enjoying the peace which the hotel tell me will change a few days before Xmas. And the empty pool, not been in it yet but it does feel a lot warmer than last year. And of course at the moment no young kids splashing around in there either...




Nothing much has changed here in the past few months apart from the two huge new houses built by the hotel for the family, very impressive they are too. There's a new small shopping centre in nearby Bophut beach and the lovely beach bar there where you sat on the sand on big cushions sipping an early evening cocktail (Carole, Deryn and Anna Marie will remember those) has gone, looks like a victim of progress in the building of the shopping centre, such a shame.
The weather is also same same. The dry season doesn't really kick in until mid to late December so the first few days here have been a bit wet and windy with narrow beaches and thundery nights but am also hoping that will change by Xmas. But of course regardless of wind or rain it is also lovely and warm all the time. Same as the people - lots of warm welcomes and welcome backs.


Technology doesn't change either - well the management of it with wifi being the most annoying. The rain seems to really affect the signal which seems a bit last century to me. But Apple and iOS 8 play their part too. Slingbox is hopeless on the iPad or mini iPad, I am reduced to watching the telly on my phone, hooray for android is what I say! Have managed to catch up with the The Apprentice and the X Factor finals. Looks like Gogglebox for tonight and am sure to remember to sky plus Xmas Day's Downton Abbey. But my tech issues do spread to the hotel too. Their wifi is not too good in my room so am forced to sit in Jordan's sports bar or here in the Irish Bar in Bophut catching up. I guess we all have to do what we have to do...







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